How to Pick Up Women

There is a HUGE LIE out there. It goes like this: “If you can get LOTS OF GIRLS INTO BED, then you MUST be able to have a successful long-term relationship”.

And the false logic continues with: “If you can get lots of girls who are ATTRACTIVE into bed, then you can FOR SURE get one girl who is “HOT” for a long term relationship”.

This lie is seriously hurting a lot of people. Why? Because deep down, 99.99 percent of guys DO SERIOUSLY WANT a great relationship.

That doesn’t mean they are NEEDY for one in some desperate way.

It just means they know what they want most.

In fact, the VAST, VAST VAAAAAAAAST majority of supposedly “cool” “pick up artists” were either BURNED in relationships or were incapable of the emotional maturity to even have a normal relationship in the first place. And they are protecting their weak fragile ego by staying out of any long term situation that can burn them again. Also, they have created a lifestyle that serves as a self-defense mechanism of distracting themselves with instant short-term temporary validations (much of which comes from their MALE peers, which is very pathetic, because it means they are not even enjoying being with that woman but rather they live for the validation and props of their male peers who also have no real lives of their own or they would be too busy for such b.s.)

This lifestyle keeps them in nice safe secure buffer zone that is nicer than total loneliness, but lacking the intimacy of something like a real relationship.

In reality, they are the softies, because they are so freakin’ scared out of their skulls to actually put any emotional risk into anything.

Also, some of these guys know it’s screwed up and don’t even live that life or don’t even really want it but they keep up the image of being that type of guy for biz to pretend they are “cool” to a bunch of fools who know even less than they do who still think it’s cool since they haven’t even had some much as a real conversation with a girl in their lives, so for them the idea of sleeping with lots of girls seems like a fantasy.

The guys who were BURNED got the MISGUIDED notion that they would “GET the girl” from NOW ON, and they would prove it to themselves over and over again. It made them feel secure.

Except for two things:

They were not getting “the girl”. They were just getting “a girl”.

In fact, they are REPULSING the kind of girl they wanted MOST.

They were getting a girl that sleeps with LOTS of guys, and they were distracting themselves from this fact by sleeping with other girls, (who of course did the same thing, because that’s the kind of girls you get in this scene) and so on and so on, in a never ending cycle.

They were NOT getting the emotional “juice” or REWARD that they really wanted.

They wanted the CONNECTION, the long term connection AND the attraction. But they were and are not getting it.

Because even CRAZY girls with a DROP of sanity are not going to have some guy seeing other girls while THEY continue to be faithful.

It’s not just that this is “unfair”, it’s that it DESTROYS the whole MEANING of sharing one’s life with another person at the highest level. There’s no POINT for a girl to be in this, unless she is some low self esteem girl or some girl who feels she has NO CHOICES.

So, the ONLY girl that will tolerate a guy seeing other girls is a girl that is NOT emotionally serious at all about the guy.

But eventually, if not immediately, most guys and girls want something MORE than this.

It has NOTHING to do with NEEDINESS.

I can give you ENDLESS examples of guys who had INFINITE choice of women who were ABSOLUTELY NOT NEEDY who WANTED to make a serious EXCLUSIVE relationship work, from Hugh Hefner the guy who started Playboy to rock stars like Gene Simmons (who seems to have successfully pulled it off and stayed away from drugs as well for many years), and about a MILLION other guys who had and have plenty of choice among women.

It has to do with being EMOTIONALY DEVELOPED as opposed to being emotionally retarded.

NEEDINESS is one thing. But the INABILITY to BOND or the FEAR of bonding is a sign of emotional wreckage.

So, the irony is, that in the eyes of any EMOTIONALY DEVELOPED WOMAN, if she sees a guy who got hurt by some woman, and then he decides to RUN from intimacy and instead DEAFEN the voices of his emotions for CONNECTION by DROWNING himself in the INSTANT EMOTIONAL DISTRACTION of getting notches on his bedpost and getting TEMPORARY DISTRACTION with one partner after another, this type of behavior will actually PUSH AWAY THE WOMAN of QUALITY that indeed he REALLY wanted.

In fact, if any guy thinks he is “getting his dignity back” and getting “validated” by that type of lifestyle, the reality is that he is ACTUALLY coming across as REPULSIVE to any woman of QUALITY.

So this is by no means some moral instruction. It’s just a fact that you need to BECOME what you want to ATTRACT. Because you attract that which you ARE.

You are a guy who is cool, fun, not needy, but ready for emotional connection and some emotional risk? You’ll find you get along quite well in a convo with a similar woman.

You are a guy who is all about short term only? You’ll find you get along quite well with a similar woman.

Now, mix the two up, and it’s a different story.

Now, the thing is, the mind is very sophisticated organism. You ARE what you THINK and DO.

So, if you were BURNED AND EMOTIONALLY INVALIDATED in a relationship, the relative emotional GAP between that PAIN and the at least TEMPORARY VALIDATION PLEASURE of winning “another conquest” feels GREAT. For a brief moment. So you move on to the next woman. Etc.

And if you do that ALL THE TIME, you start to seriously think that is the only world that really has any meaning. Because you take on the beliefs that THAT is the way to go.

You BLIND yourself to any OTHER reality.

Which is why pick up artists are addicted to the NEXT one, because the validation and emotional reward is so weak that they have to do it again with someone new to help distract themselves. No wonder it is a lifestyle, because it has to be REGULAR AND REPEATING, or it quickly lacks ANY meaning altogether.

And if you don’t believe me, go and try it. Live the pick up lifestyle, and make sure to get new partners as well, so don’t JUST do pickup and focus on how attraction works, like a fisherman who fishes but puts the fish back to the sea, but actually have lots of partners as well, for a few months.

And then see how you feel if you stop for one or two days. See how you feel. It feels like something is very empty. As if there is a NEED to go and do pick up because NOTHING else seems to mean anything, and that’s because everything else reminds you of the OTHER world which is a real downer when you are not part of it. In fact, you go so far as to BERATE the other world as in “haaa look at those fools in relationships haaa all just waiting to get cheated on those fools haaa”.

This gives the cult like movement a nice security blanket to feel good about being nuts.

But they need that blanket, because the validation is short term for guys in this lifestyle.

ESPECIALLY since these guys know that THE CHICKS they have been having sex with do NOT CARE about them on even a FRACTION of the level of something that would exist in a REAL relationship that actually WORKED.

In fact, that’s ***WHY*** the chick has sex with him. It’s because she DOESN’T care that much, so it doesn’t matter if she’s not really ATTRACTED to him!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

After all, he’s only the LATEST guy! There will be another guy by Tuesday!

So she DOESN’T’ CARE if she is not attracted, he is simply there for CONVENIENCE for now.

So that guy that is a TOTAL DORK that becomes a pick up addict? He’s an even BIGGER dork now if he think that PICK UP IN AND OF ITSELF IS MAKING HIM “THE MAN”, because at least before he KNEW he was getting a raw deal, so he got out of it, but now, he THINKS the chicks care about him, when in fact they would sell him for a piece of toilet paper in an instant. And yet, he THINKS he’s THE MAN.

Now THAT’S sad.

This is the stuff that the sleaze balls DO NOT WANT YOU TO KNOW.

In fact, they will tell you that “Any chick who isn’t up to the instant-gratification-SEX-right away-program must have LOW SELF-ESTEEM and have “ISSUES”!!!! So they tell the guy, “You deserve to have a better girl than that, like this s-k-a-n-k right here for example! Go for her, man!”

So, that means it’s all about QUANTITY. Next, next, next. Mass production. The instant orgasm mentality.

To me, learning pick up is a MEANS to an ENDS. It’s NOT about pick up for pick-ups sake. The process is fun, yes, but it’s fun because you are learning SO MUCH about human interaction.

And the truth is, no matter how many times a pick up artist tries to pretend that it’s not about the lifestyle in and of itself, how the *&^% can he really mean it when he keeps on showing off about his CONQUESTS?????????

Clearly, for these guys, it IS about the lifestyle. And that lifestyle is based MOST on: Getting validation from other GUYS.

Don’t get me wrong. A REAL relationship, a GREAT relationship with a woman is many things, and ONE of those things is CARNAL. Definitely.

It’s just not the ONLY thing.

And in fact, the SEX becomes BETTER with time if you know how to CONNECT with each other on a very deep level because you are able to UNLEASH and you are able TO TRUST so much deeper than with anyone else, because after all, you have SHARED so much more.

The problem is that these days we are living in an emotionally RETARDED society. We have often bad examples that teach us. The truth is that the greatest gift parents can give their children is to love each other but how often does this happen? Sometimes, children who had rough childhoods where the parents did not love each other actually have a GREATER desire for a real relationship, because they APPRECIATE how precious it is to have that and they really want that for themselves. So if they meet another person like that, they might hit it off really well. But sometimes it creates a cynicism in people, and a belief that life is all about “me”, or insecurities that the other gender is never to be trusted, etc.

So of course, that makes for a really selfish relationship that crumbles long term. Where everything is about the career, or the money, or the bigger house, the car, or comparing with the neighbor’s house or car. Sure greed has ALWAYS been part of human nature, but at least there were COMPETING values at one time. But now, it takes a real INDIVIDUAL THINKER to not be swept up with the masses.

Similar to the individual who is not swept up with the current TREND of pick up lifestyle.

And like all trends, it will sway one way, and then the next, like Madonna who preaches as the material girl, the sexual girl, then the spiritual girl, and anything else she can to keep changing her image as something new.

BUT REAL EMOTIONAL TRUTH DEFIES TRENDS.

IT IS UNIVERSAL AND TIMELESS.

Which is why if you are serious about a great relationship, you have to SCREEN for the right woman with the right values.

And such a woman is hardly going to be DRAWN to a guy that lives the lifestyle of constant gaming, pick up, and multiple partners.

Now, this brings me to PART II:

Before I continue, I just want to mention that you will be doing ME and the WORLD a huge favor if you FORWARD this newsletter to people you think could LEARN from it.

The CRUCIAL QUESTION then is:

HOW DO YOU ATTRACT A WOMAN OF QUALITY FOR A GREAT LONG TERM RELATIONSHIP?

And the answer to that is SIMPLE, yet not EASY.

You must be COMPELLING and yet also be a GOOD PERSON.

Believe me, women WANT a good guy. I SWEAR TO IT.

Especially women who are great people themselves. They ESPECIALLY want a guy who is a great person.

It’s just that they want a good guy who they are ATTRACTED to.

Just like YOU want a good woman who you are also ATTRACTED to.

It’s MUCH EASIER to create some SHORT TERM impact by resorting to the energies of the NEGATIVE.

Kinda like what Yoda said about the force. One side was easier, faster. But he never said it was stronger.

And when you give in to the easy but wrong path, you get the consequence, AS THE UNIVERSE GIVES YOU BACK ULTIMATELY WHAT YOU GAVE.

For example, think to yourself of how RARE it is even for HOLLYWOOD to create TRULY compelling characters who are also GOOD people? So often, the good guys seem boring. But Hannibal Lecter, there’s someone INTERESTING. Or the bad guys in Pulp Fiction.

But those kind of movies just catch our attention for a brief moment, then pass, forgotten and not desired to be repeated. (p.s. that’s why Tarantino really is only famous for that ONE movie even though at the time everyone said he would be the next big thing. )

They don’t LAST with us in a good way. You don’t want to see it over and over again. Because you DON’T LIKE THE CHARACTER.

Now, contrast THAT with the RARE GOOD GUY who IS compelling: Think of Jim Carrey in Liar Liar. Sure, he’s not perfect, he’s human, but he’s a NORMAL guy, and a GOOD guy who really WANTS to be with his kid.

And he’s ALSO got INFINITE PERSONALITY. TONS of AWESOME stuff, from the way he connects with his kid when he DOES do it right to the way he roasts all his office colleagues.

And his sense of confident humor. Seriously, go rent the flick. SEE CONFIDENT PERSONALITY IN ACTION.

Now, of course, you have to be careful not to TEETER over the edge to become GOOFY, but if you’re too serious, you can learn a LOT from a guy like that.

Similarly, the MASK. The Mask’s humor and personality is NEVER submissive, yet he is FUNNY AS HECK. In fact, his humor IS SOAKING in confidence.

Yes, these are comedies, but the DUDE has awesome PERSONALITY. When he puts on that mask, he UNLEASHES all the awesome stuff that IS REALLY HIM that he normally in his other identity, (the repressed by society version of himself) would NOT let out.

Most GOOD guys need to put on a Mask like that to unleash the COOL YET GOOD GUY underneath.

Similarly, the new Star Wars movies SUCK because the GOOD GUYS all seem BORING as hell. (the bad guys are boring too, but that’s besides the point)

But the OLD Star Wars movies, ALL the GOOD GUYS had COMPELLING CHARACTERS, PERSONALITIES, IDENTITIES. (In fact, all the characters were interesting, women as well.)

Especially a guy like Han Solo, but really ALL the characters were interesting.

It’s much much MUCH more cool to have a guy that IS a good guy and IS ALSO cool than it is to just be A JERK.

i.e. Luke, Han Solo, James Bond, Indiana Jones, and even the likes of Jim Carrey’s characters in his movies, like The Mask!

You can be lots of things, but you can’t be BORING.

But because GOOD GUYS tend to often be SILENT when it comes to making the first impression, they lose by default to the jerks who really are just a TINY iota better than NOTHING.

So, just like in the movies, where audiences would rather see INTERESTING bad guys than BORING good guys, (i.e. Pulp Fiction) so too in the real world the JERKS get EASY attention.

They are forgotten easily too. But this is why you as a GOOD GUY have a RESPONSIBILITY to STAND OUT in a COOL WAY, otherwise you are LETTING the jerks win by DEFAULT.

Being a COOL AND INTERESTING GOOD GUY is farrrrrrrrrrrrrrr MORE rare and far more powerful than just being a jerk.

So if YOU can be that good guy who is ALSO cool and compelling, you are going to RULE.

Same thing by the way when it comes to women, it’s rare to meet a woman who is a GOOD PERSON and is ALSO a great fun person to be with. Too often, the good girls let themselves go and aren’t sexy, and too often the sexy girls are too superficial. But a girl who is sexy and has the personality as well, she will RULE. And you can bet she is not going to settle for some jerk.

That flick The Notebook, same thing, there are actually NO JERKS in that movie, the lead guy is not a jerk and yet he is still INTERESTING, he is COMPELLING.

And hmmmm, chicks LOVE that movie.

THE VIBES of the flick are what creates the MOOD, the STATE OF MIND, in the person watching it.

AND IN REAL LIFE, THE VIBES YOU GIVE A WOMAN LOOONG TERM ARE WHAT COUNT.

If a guy is a sleaze-ball, and you are with a GOOD woman, she will EVENTUALLY catch on. Unfortunately, many sleaze-balls have learned to ACT decent enough to get a woman short term. That’s why I say saint or bastard, attraction is about understanding what WORKS and DOING it.

But the thing is, to be effective, you have to be CONGRUENT. Your actions and words and everything about you has to be consistent. A sleaze ball simply will find it too much WORK to ACT congruent on all these levels and WILL slip up and he will be dumped on his butt.

But it’s really sad to see guys who WERE good guys, who become sleazeballs or even lower their own standards of behavior because they think it will ATTRACT a woman of QUALITY the same way it attracted the other lower caliber women.

The biggest IRONY is that pick up artists all talk about “vibing” but the LIMITS to this vibing are SO PATHETIC.

Because the extent of vibing you need for having sex with a party girl is very LITTLE.

In a REAL RELATIONSHIP, you have to naturally have this VIBE about you LONG TERM, even after heated arguments, hard times, etc. You like each other because of the REAL VIBES that you have for each other’s TOTALITY, that includes sexuality for sure, but ALSO INCLUDES YOUR ENTIRE IDENTITY. Not JUST sex. But why would pick up artists care about that?

To me, while I was learning about pick up, I focused on learning about ALL THE EMOTIONS involved in human interaction, because sex was not my only concern.

You’ve probably noticed that about me throughout the years if you’ve been a long time follower of the newsletters as well as my materials of course.

So how can you be a GOOD GUY while also having a COMPELLING personality and “aura”?

I can’t tell you how to be a good guy, I’m assuming you already ARE.

But being a good guy who is compelling requires you to know how to DEVELOP the parts of yourself that ARE cool and UNIQUE.

And you have to learn to SHOW these dimensions of yourself as well, or a woman won’t know a thing about you when you first meet her. Often, that’s your only chance to make an impression.

In order to do that, you need to also understand how to reflect your individuality through MANY THINGS, including your sense of STYLE, to name just ONE thing.

You also need to learn how to take on a NEW WAY of looking at the world that will LIBERATE your emotions and make you super resourceful to accomplish what you thought was impossible, both in your love life and in your career.

You need to learn how to unleash your identity, and communicate it through your humor as well. It helps to understand in fact what HUMOR is, and also what ATTRACTIVE humor is.

And you also need to have a plan that you can fall back on in case you meet a woman and for a second you STALL. A plan that enables you to STILL go about the interaction even if you WEREN’T IN PERFECT STATE.

And I can show you ALL THIS, in DETAIL, in a clearly organized, easy to understand way.

If you want to MASTER this area of your life, don’t waste any time. Change the path of your love life right NOW by getting the entire technology and wisdom of my most advanced program sent to you IMMEDIATELY:

The Seduction Mastery Apprenticeship Program CD Set.

This Program is massively comprehensive: You will also learn to create the EMOTIONS in women that make LIFE worth LIVING for them. You will learn to create DEEP attraction, trust, connection, AND you will learn to incorporate all this naturally, for you will GROW as a PERSON with these insights and skills. It will become a product of who you ARE, and not just of something you “do”.

This program is the only one of its kind that will teach you the most sophisticated level of EMOTIONAL DYNAMICS especially as it relates to ATTRACTION.

And of course, in order to BE with the woman of your dreams, you have to pick her up as well: So, to ensure you ACE this part too, I’ve ALSO included TONS of EXPLICIT, DETAILED information on EXACTLY how to smoothly perform the pickup ANYWHERE, from FIRST seeing her all the way to getting physical and beyond.

And if you haven’t yet downloaded my eBook, The Dating Wizard: Secrets to Success with Women, then do that first. It’s the FOUNDATION on which the more advanced concepts in my above program build upon.

If you can make a woman feel intense PLEASURE, she will be yours.

Pleasure is the reason we are attracted to ANYTHING.

Now, the human mind is pretty sophisticated, including women’s minds. We are not going to be attracted to just anything.

This goes back to evolution, because by feeling the emotion of attraction toward things that would help us survive, it gave us an advantage. It motivated us.

And being repulsed by things that were bad for us also helped us survive. It kept us away from the wrong things.

i.e. Bad spoiled food. So by developing an AVERSION to spoiled food. So those who felt it tasted HORRIBLE were more likely to survive and replicate.

We also evolved to be ATTRACTED to foods that were GOOD for us. So, for example, those who had genes that enabled them to percieving fruit as tasting “sweet”, were motivated to find it and eat it. And so they too were more likely to survive and replicate.

Of course, it doesn’t always work perfectly, as candy bars also taste good to us, because candy bars are relatively new in human history, and our brains haven’t evolved yet to “NOT enjoy candy bars but still enjoy fruit”.

But the fact is, our brains have evolved in a way where now we are HARDWIRED to be attracted to certain things. To perceive them as “sweet”. And to be repulsed by other things, to perceive them as “yucky”. And everything in between.

So, the KEY to attracting a WOMAN is to do EVERYTHING in your POWER to come across as BEING DESIRABLE, according to the emotional part of her brain.

So you have to INTERACT with a woman by behaving in a way that CONVEYS MASSIVE VALUE to her.

Most guys TRY to do this but do it all wrong, so let’s get clear on what value REALLY looks like, sounds like, and feels like.

Behavior is not just your ACTIONS. It’s not just your words.

It’s not just your voice tonality.

It’s not just your clothing.

It’s not just your attitude.

It’s not just your BODY LANGUAGE.

It’s not just your sense of humor.

It’s not just the way you REACT to her.

It’s not just the people she sees you hang out with or don’t hang out with.

It’s not just the way you feel about sex, i.e. comfortable or not.

It’s not just how you make her mind race trying to figure you out, or wondering or fantasizing what might come next.

It’s not just how slow or fast you are to validate her or to withhold validating her.

It’s not just how you touch her and how calm or confident you are about it.

It’s not just how MUCH you can control THE FRAME of the situation.

IT’S ALL THE ABOVE AND MUCH MORE.

Every single thing about you, and every single thing about the situation you are in with a woman, can be used to make her feel you are MORE DESIRABLE, or if done wrong, to make her feel that you are LESS desirable.

And the more desirable you seem, the MORE PLEASURE she feels from getting closer to you.

This is why I am so ADAMANT about not just sticking to ONE thing to over-simplify the process. This is not the McDonalds of attraction.

To be THE BEST, you have to understand how ALL the components of attraction play a role and you have to USE these components.

If you want the McDonald’s style pick up and attraction advice, there are a billion other guys out there. If you want the Rolls Royce, this is the place.

EVERYTHING, in fact, that happens while you are chatting to a woman to pick her up, or even if you’ve known her a long time and she is your girlfriend, EVERTHING that is happening in the situation can be used to make you MORE ATTRACTIVE or LESS ATTRACTIVE.

So, for example, if a woman is acting like a b***c, that’s not a bad thing! ONLY YOUR REACTION TO IT COUNTS. If you react the way a guy who is DESIRABLE acts, then you become MORE ATTRACTIVE.

I’m not saying you have to LOVE a woman who is acting like a b****, but the fact is, your REACTION to it will make ALL THE DIFFERENCE IN THE WORLD to her attraction to you.

If you act the way a guy who is NOT DESIRABLE acts, then you become LESS ATTRACTIVE.

So if for example a woman says something like “We don’t talk to guys at clubs, we just get free drinks from them!”, and your reaction is “Cool, maybe you can work for me then, I’m looking for some hustlers that have ambition. But first, let’s see how good you are and get me and my buddy some drinks.”

So her “act of superiority” backfires, because the way you framed it, it’s just a way that she can possibly EARN your interest, but she has to PROVE her worth to you still, and in fact you’re still the one with greater value in the situation. And yet it’s all fun and playful too, which ALSO feels good. So there’s attraction pleasure going on, and fun times as well. Which makes her attraction more intense, because emotions feed energy into each other. Not bad, and all done in a few seconds. And she set herself up for it. And she’s feeling way more pleasure with YOU than she is with all those guys who were kissing up and trying so hard and being so serious.

And, it’s VERY POSSIBLE to NOT TEASE A GIRL and STILL pick her up SUPER EASILY.

Teasing is just ONE EFFECTIVE method, because it’s a natural OUTGROWTH of you KNOWING YOU ARE DESIRABLE.

Because you are feeling an abundance of good vibes internally and feeling you are so desirable, that energy shows and is ATTRACTIVE. This makes you not worried about women’s reactions to you, so you become PLAYFUL with women, instead of being so serious and formal.

This is why a mean spirited tease doesn’t work. Because it’s not a sign of value, it’s a sign of an angry guy or a socially retarded guy. Anger is usually a sign of loss or fear or insecurity as well. All signs of LACK OF VALUE. So the hardwiring in her brain is REPULSED by it.

It’s a fine line between feeling value, and feeling arrogant to the point of being a prick – which is not attractive. Practice on real women makes perfect, as you get a better feel for it and your calibration skills grow.

But in general, guys are trying SO HARD to VALIDATE a woman that hasn’t done anything to deserve that, she simply LOOKS BEAUTIFUL. And a woman sense that a guy that behaves that way must be LOW VALUE, her EMOTIONS sense this, not her logic so much.

This is why NOT VALIDATING a woman who is attractive is such a powerful thing. It creates a TENSION, the same kind of tension that YOU feel regarding the fact that a woman who is beautiful is HARD to get.

Believe me, if it was raining women who were gorgeous on you everyday and they just wanted to kiss up to you, you would get bored. You actually value women more because they are hard to get, because they don’t try to validate you. Of course, there is a limit to this, as too much is too much, there has to a PAYOFF, where she DOES show some interest, where you DO get the girl, or she is JUST a tease.

Similarly, when you tease a girl, literally or figurately, it’s not to tease her permanently, it’s to create the tension in her so now she WANTS to be validated by you. That way, your interest in her feels good for her.

THAT’S what leads to her interest and sexual desire, etc. Similar to what makes YOU want to be with her.

So that’s why when you don’t give a woman who is attractive what she wants so fast, it’s cool. The idea though is to do it matter of factly, not MEANLY. Or do it in a humorous way. So if she asks you for the time and you are at the bus stop, you say how much do you want to give me for it, etc. If she’s at the gym and she’s all hot after a workout and buying herself a water bottle, you make fun of her for pouring water on herself to make it look like she’s trying to workout. And it’s not done with “vengeance”, it’s done out of VALUE, YOUR VALUE, and PLAYFULNESS.

When you don’t validate a girl easily, it’s FUN for her, her hardwiring feels there’s something of VALUE here, i.e. YOU. And she wants to get it. Again, a fine line between doing this too much and doing it too little.

And the thing is, I don’t even think about it anymore. It’s just a form of communication, I’m not even trying to always pick up a girl, it’s just the way I feel.

So for example, I was at the bank, and this hottie teller who’s not even my teller but far away, is being consulted by my teller for something. So the hottie makes a mistake and the hottie tells me all the way from where she is that she made a mistake, and she says she’s so dizzy, hearing voices in her head. So I tell her, loud enough so that everyone can hear, “must be those recreational drugs you keep on using” and I say it with a serious face, but she KINDA KNOWS I’m joking because the tonality is so matter of fact that for sure I’m NOT being serious. Her jaw drops, THEN she laughs, and she says, “Don’t say that! These people don’t know, they think you’re serious!” But as she says it, you can tell she’s ENJOYING it.

So I go “Who’s joking?” AGAIN in a deadpan serious way. Which is actually funnier, because it’s more extreme of an accusation which makes the whole thing NOT true. She gives that big smile, and she “GETS IT”.

I’m just like this all the time, it translates into everything I do, including when I decide to dabble for fun on the net and have some fun with women on dating sites. I put up a profile, usually without even putting a picture, and I get “hot listed” usually by women who are the most attractive on the site. Because the profile is just me being this same way, from my profile name to my description to whatever I write.

Instead of SAYING “I am great and sexy and fun” they FEEL it from reading it. i.e. I make jokes about how I have an eternal erection and that it’s really tough and that every girl thinks I like her, even Big Bertha, and that I have to tell her “It’s not you, it’s ME”. Stuff like that.

THEY GET IT. Because they FEEL the vibe of value, of non-neediness, of sexuality, of playfulness, the message behind the message. They are LAUGHING AND FEELING it, instead of reading “I am great”.

And, in a way, even with guys I know, i.e. at the gym, I’m just a playful, confident, fun dude. No, not because I’m trying to pick them up, although we actually bust on each other about that stuff too,- i.e. “You hardly spot me anymore! You don’t like my spots? I saw you spotting a few other guys- you’re a SPOT-WHORE!” because we are SECURE in our masculinity, unlike most guys.

This is the VIBE. And women pick up on it when they are around us, it’s ATTRACTIVE to women, even though we really aren’t even TRYING.

It works because we are secure, and because we are having FUN. We are not looking for approval, but we are not jerks, in fact we actually have a certain amount of trust going on. Like at the gym, we bust on each other all the time.

So the same vibes of security, feeling trust and confidence that the other person will “GET it”, and the playfulness is there, all this is the same stuff that works on women, except you also add the PHYSICAL ESCALATION with women and the sexual vibes state that you need to be in, and you add just the right amount of DOMINANCE at the right time – at the beginning, and when transitioning things to the next level of escalation.

And that’s just a BEGINNING of an interaction. But the beginning COUNTS, because you are ESTABLISHING THE FRAME. So if I open a set of girls ANYWHERE, coffee shop, club, store, anywhere, the very FIRST words are ALSO said with the tonality that makes the frame CLEAR: “This is my world, it’s a great world, I’m laid back, and I’m inviting you in by the mere fact I’m talking to you, without making it a formal ass-kissing invitation.”

Sometimes, the girls seem a bit confused at that VERY FIRST second, because this doesn’t happen to them everyday, so they aren’t sure what’s going on. I don’t abandon ship. I STAY ON COURSE, and just KEEP ON GOING with it, and they “get on board” fast.

What a lot of guys do is they try to act cool with a tease, but have nothing to follow it up with. Because they are too focused on the ACT of teasing, and not focused on the PRINCIPLE of feeling secure and SUPERIOR SELF VALUE. The mere act of WORRYING about what she thinks so much so that you can come up with the perfect thing t o say next is something she CAN DETECT because she has seen the various forms of insecurity a million times in other guys.

And she detects that you are trying so hard for her, TOO HARD, too fast before even KNOWING HER AT ALL, before she has done anything to DESERVE that effort. So THAT implies to her subconscious that you are NOT WORTH MUCH.

So her brain feels NO PLEASURE.

At EVERY point in an interaction with a woman from meeting her the first time all the way to sex and beyond and even into a serious relationship, there is the way a guy with VALUE would act and the way a guy without value would act.

So if you are at a club and have gone up to a girl or group of girls and teased them and then you are chatting with the girl you like most, and you tell her to come sit down with you where it’s quieter, and she resists, how do you react?

Does it AFFECT your sense of self-worth? Or are you COMPLETELY COOL and still feeling the sexual vibes inside of you and feeling good and you chat her up some more and then GO FOR IT AGAIN? That would be a decent strategy. Or, another strategy that would be cool would be to just be more dominant in your OWN FRAME about the idea of her going with you.

Because if YOU think it’s a big deal, that means that YOU FEEL SHE HAS SUPERIOR VALUE, so when she resists going, you think she is actually doing the RIGHT THING for herself, since you don’t feel you have the value! So you actually feel GUILTY about trying to get her to come sit down with you!

But if you DID FEEL YOU HAD THE VALUE, then you would feel it’s in HER interest to come with you! Because SHE would be having a great time. So then instead of feeling GUILTY, you would be smiling and maybe wink at her, and take her hand while looking in her EYES and say “don’t deprive yourself!”

GET IT?

And when you DO take her hand, don’t take it like a GIRL. Take it like a MAN. I used to be scared I might crush a girl’s hand because I work out so much, but then I realized that the worst thing that ever happens if I DO hold her too firmly is the girl thinks I’m JOKING and she tries to SQUEEZE BACK as hard as she can and laughs. So it’s all good, as they say, since it only adds to the FUN vibes.

Superiority. Value. Fun. Sexuality. DOMINANCE.

These are actually ALL FORMS OF PLEASURE for a woman when you convey them.

And that is what you want to give a woman.

Another important note on pleasure:

SEX is obviously one of the HIGHEST forms of pleasure. So, do you realize how HORRIFYINGLY TERRIBLE OF A MISTAKE IT IS TO COME ACROSS AS TOO “NICE” by avoiding any sexual undertones to your interaction? Or by COMING ACROSS as “too NICE for HARDCORE sex”?

A woman ALREADY has to deal with cultural brainwashing of feeling like a slut if she is too “easy”, so if you are going to ALSO have “issues” with sex, by not being in a sexual state yourself, or by avoiding any sexual content to your conversation, she will feel that things are going to be VERY RESTRICTED AND NOT FUN WITH YOU IN THE BEDROOM.

And of course, when you DO get to to the bedroom part, you have to realize that all that “not wanting to be a slut” fear is something that goes out the window – if you have issues in the bedroom, if you feel bad about sex, how the heck is SHE going to feel good about it???

So you see, at EVERY stage of the interaction, it’s ALWAYS about increasing the PLEASURE, it’s about making her feel greater and more INTENSE emotions- this is why creating that CONNECTION with her is also important, because it makes the experience of being with you MORE INTIMATE, more meaningful.

But don’t think for one SECOND it’s connection for connection’s sake. It’s about how that can make the whole experience even more of a RUSH. Sex with a girl you are not only ATTRACTED to, but who you also feel CONNECTED TO, feels WAY MORE INTENSE.

It’s the same for a girl when it comes to how SHE feels.

One last point on pleasure for now- in general, we want MORE AND MORE of it, not less and less. So, once things are heating up with a woman, whether it’s your opening up of the conversation, the teases, the contact, don’t RUIN it by going backwards into INFERIOR GUY MODE, i.e. “playing it emotionally safe for yourself”

This is what happens with so many guys, they are finally making progress and getting somewhere, they are getting how all this works, the girl is getting attracted, but then the guy starts to get TOO DEPENDENT ON THE OUTCOME and he starts to get needy for it, and he displays the characteristics of inferiority instead of BEING THE MAN!

So, if she’s laughing, she’s sitting down with you, you’re holding her hand, kissing, whatever it is, KEEP IT GOING to the NEXT LEVEL as much as possible.

That doesn’t mean to make out with her non stop at the bar, and it doesn’t mean to KEEP ON TEASING her non-stop. That’s not what I mean at all. What I mean is take things to the NEXT level of the interaction. You kind of KNOW in your gut when it’s time to move on from the opener, when it’s time to go into rapport, when it’s time to hold her hand, when it’s time to kiss her, when it’s time to escalate to sex. You have to MAKE it happen, and not stay in the “emotional zero-risk zone”.

But like I said, what happens is that guys have this guy idea in their minds that their VALUE is at stake, so they don’t want to screw up. That’s just more society brainwashing though, because in fact going for it is the way to get good.

But guys let the ego control them, they are AFRAID of getting rejected by going for the NEXT STAGE, be it leaving with her, or kissing her, or whatever it is that comes next. But the whole way you GOT to the good situation in the first place was by NOT following your fears, but rather following what you DO WANT.

You CAN’T WIN by adopting the “fear” strategy of “staying where you are because you got somewhere and you don’t want to RUIN it”.

The WORST THING that happens from GOING for it is that maybe she resists. THAT’S FINE. First of all, it’s usually only TEMPORARY, it just means she’s not ready to escalate right that SECOND. In three minutes from that time, she may very well be TOTALLY RECEPTIVE to your escalation again.

And no matter what, you’ll improve your calibration and sense of timing for next time.

And the best thing that happens, is that you get EXACTLY WHAT YOU WANT and have the time of your life. And the reality is that with this technology that I am teaching, it’s actually FAR MORE LIKELY to get what you want, than to get the opposite reaction.

This newsletter has touched on some CRUCIAL elements of attraction. And yet it’s just the TIP of the ICEBERG. There is MUCH MUCH MORE, from how to create MORE pleasure by being DIFFERENT, by being unpredictable so her mind cannot ADAPT and thus cannot get bored, to how to dress in a way that accents sexuality and superiority and fun and triggers those awesome emotions in her. To how your LIFESTYLE fits into all this to OPTIMIZE your attractive power. To how all this plays into SEX as well. And how to adapt your game for a club environment and for quieter environments, and much more.

If you would like to learn in the FASTEST WAY, the best thing is to LEARN IT ALL HANDS-ON in my bootcamp. You’ll be IMMERSED in REAL WORLD pickup for 3 DAYS and 3 NIGHTS. I’ll demonstrate it for you again and again, so you can EXPERIENCE and see the subtleties of EFFECTIVE humor, dominance, bonding, physical escalation, and much more. I’ll coach you as you wing with me, I’ll give you EXACT SPECIFICS on what to do IMMEDIATELY to improve everything in your game, from your body language, to your frame of humor, to your voice, to what you are doing to get a girl to move from A to B. I’ll also DELVE into your inner game and find the obstacles holding you back internally and help you blast them away FOR GOOD.

And I’ll take your sense of style to the next level so that you start stirring women’s emotions as soon as they see you, even before you’ve said a word.

It’s all at:

http://www.pick-up-women.com/bootcamp.shtml

And if you would like to have this knowledge available at your FINGERTIPS, 24/7, then it’s time you got my Seduction Mastery Apprenticeship Program CD Set.

This Program will REVOLUTIONIZE the way you look at attraction and the way you interact with women, and you can come back to it again and again whenever you have a question, for YEARS to come.

No matter how you look at it, this program will seriously increase your results. If you take it before the bootcamp, it will prepare you so that you can push yourself even FURTHER and gain even MORE skill.

If you take it after the bootcamp, it’s an EXCELLENT way to KEEP you on top of your game as you continue to use the skills in the real world and refer to the program for any questions that may arise.

And if you haven’t yet downloaded my eBook, The Dating Wizard: Secrets to Success with Women, then do that IMMEDIATELY. This book is the DNA of attraction, the foundation on which all my other programs build upon. You can download it to your computer in a few minutes from now and start using it on women TODAY.

Attraction is an EMOTION.

It’s the result of many different emotions actually. But for now, let’s just realize that it is an EMOTION. An emotion that a woman wants more of.

But in order to GIVE women this emotion, YOU have to be feeling certain emotions yourself.

There are many, but let’s get to the basics, right now.

The first emotion that’s uber important is feeling self-worth and the second emotion is not feeling needy. This is different from being the guy who says in a rip-roaring voice, “I don’t need women, I don’t give a DAMN what those b****** say” etc etc. That’s just a negative attitude.

I’m talking about not being needy in a POSITIVE way.

Now, am I saying you can’t get any results with low self esteem? No, but you will be faking, and if you NEED to, fine, that might help you get some results which will help you get some self-esteem and confidence. But you really want to be working on this area as much as possible, it will make a huge difference to your success and also attract you to BETTER quality women. Usually, low self-esteem guys end up with low-self esteem women.

When a guy feels that his life has meaning, and that there are important things going on in it, he tends to be less needy for the approval of a woman. He doesn’t tend to go on for years pining for a woman.

But the thing is, it’s not exactly easy for him to get out of the situation since he has been brainwashed to believe that in fact he is doing the RIGHT THING by pining.

If you ever find yourself in a situation where you are feeling neediness for long periods of time, especially for one PARTICULAR woman, chances are it’s not really that you need that particular woman to get rid of that neediness.

You just need to get a life. Often, it’s the meaningful life you had before you got all caught up in this craziness that wiped out all the other things you used to do.

And if you didn’t have a life beforehand, then it’s even EASIER to get sucked into the fiction of believing your life is all about some chick, who doesn’t even feel the same way about you.

But reverse rationalization kicks in, and what happens is that because you’ve spent so long FOCUSING ON THE FICTION (but you don’t realize it’s fiction at the time) OF HOW “BAD” it is without some particular woman, you start to believe your own fiction.

You are what you think and do, as I often say and truly believe with every fiber of my soul.

And added to this, the very energy and time spent on all this “mourning” deprives you of energy and time that could have been spent on doing things in your REAL LIFE, and which would actually give you back your self-esteem and help you realize what a negative fiction you’ve been brainwashing yourself with.

So it’s a pretty powerful negative cycle that needs to be STOPPED. But it can be hard for a guy, because the negative emotional momentum seems so real, even though it’s a trick on your mind. You don’t realize that the secret and the emotional freedom is just a step away.

Kind of like this scene in the movie “V for Vendetta” where the girl thinks she’s imprisoned, when really she could walk out anytime, but she THINKS she’s in a REAL prison, so since her mind believes it, it’s as if she IS in prison and she feels all the accompanying emotions. And she IS trapped, because she FEELS trapped, FEELS helpless.

So you gotta have faith in this stuff I teach, and that there IS a better emotional reality outside your door, or otherwise you are trapping yourself in a FAKE NEGATIVE reality.

And really, that negative belief IS a FAKE reality, because all that “love” that a guy feels for some girl that hasn’t even done anything to deserve it, well that guy actually thinks she IS special, largely BECAUSE OF THE VERY FACT that HE HAS SPENT SO MUCH TIME THINKING ABOUT HER!

Circular logic, makes no sense, but the mind is not always logical.

Emotions are more powerful than logic.

So anyway, it makes him think that the chick is “special”, but how special can she be if she really doesn’t even like him?

See, the guy doesn’t even think HE has any say in the matter of his own emotions, he has given over so much of his own emotional power to some woman who has done nothing to earn it.

He doesn’t even realize he HAS a say over his own emotional destiny.

If he did, it would be the first step towards changing his external reality with women as well.

You gotta take a leap of faith in order to get to the GOOD REALITY.

And that’s a big step, but a super important one.

I always talk about the fact that attracting a woman is about one thing – the EMOTIONS you are giving her.

But the first step to achieving THAT is giving YOURSELF the great emotions.

And how do you feel better and better about yourself? BY GROWING AS A PERSON. There are infinite ways to grow as a person, but they are all great. They all improve your own self-esteem and emotional state.

To me, one of the greatest ways to grow as a person is to learn to GIVE YOURSELF great emotions without the use of drugs, and to learn to give OTHERS great emotions as well. Having a life that is rich with interesting activities and/or people and giving, as well as taking, (nothing wrong with taking as well, it’s when it’s only about taking that you get into problems) it all feels GREAT and does wonders for you. Or having a job that you like is great too, because you spend lots of time on that.

By learning things, skills, doing new things, meeting new people, and to me the BIGGEST form of growing is growing EMOTIONALLY in your ability to experience both great emotions naturally and internally and also to GIVE great emotions to others.

All this stuff is really rudimentary for your inner game. Think of it as super beginner level stuff. Too many guys have no emotional good stuff in their life and are looking to a woman or to women in general to fill up a vacuum in their emotions, but it won’t cure the problem.

Now, once you got that handled, THEN it’s time to get your “game” up to new levels.

But never forget that without that stuff, it’s going to be very difficult to give women awesome emotions, because when you are in a crappy state, it’s hard to NOT feel needy, it’s hard to feel emotional ABUNDANCE, it’s hard to feel that upbeat sexual vibe, etc.

So ultimately, it’s interesting, because in order to “get” a woman, what you are really doing is getting a lot of things for yourSELF first. You are improving yourSELF. ESPECIALLY in the area of CREATING AWESOME EMOTIONS.

Because EMOTIONS are the CURRENCY of attraction.

VALUE is only value if it FEELS good.

So the more awesome emotions you can give a woman, the better. Which means that the less needy you are, to mention just one characteristic, the more you are giving her, because your neediness would only feel like a DRAIN on her good emotions.

There’s nothing wrong with being KIND! In FACT, finding AWESOME AND NEW AND CREATIVE WAYS of showing your AFFECTION for her, that are customized for HER is CRUCIAL, but, and this is the HUUUUUUUUUUUGE BUT, the PROBLEM problem is that the EXTREME kindness that “nice guys” typically show is actually the “nice guy” neediness.

“Nice guys” ONLY focus on this stuff, and because the “nice guy” himself feels like he has nothing else to offer, and it’s a self-fulfilling prophecy, because he has become so needy he really comes across as inferior. And he DROWNS her in this stuff, so it loses all its meaning and all of its emotional impact. It becomes boring and pathetic.

The guy feels so needy for her, and he doesn’t realize that this neediness is an artificial creation that has grown to a reality in his own mind, fostered by all the wrong information we get on what is natural and what is not.

We THINK neediness is natural, but it’s not. There is an easy cure for it – it’s called getting self-esteem from something else that is healthier. Such as healthier beliefs.

Onward: Attraction is ALL about and ONLY about the emotions that you are giving her.

So we already know that your self-esteem and non-neediness is something that not only gives YOU good emotions but also makes HER feel good too, and amplifies her attraction to you.

What else?

TONS of things.

Besides the obvious things you can do to improve “exterior” type stuff like appearance like being fit and living a healthy lifestyle, the way you use your VOICE can be used to create emotion.

Your sense of HUMOR creates emotion. Especially if used in a way that not only makes her laugh but also makes her feel SECURE because of the supreme vibes of security that emanate from your sense of humor.

Similarly, your CONFIDENCE, your LEADERSHIP, your SEXUAL VIBES, and even your ability to interact well with PEOPLE in general.

And once a woman is INTERESTED in you, then YES, absolutely, the way you show KINDNESS is something that is highly emotionally RELEVANT. THIS is when doing something “romantic” matters, especially if done in a way that is ORIGINAL and combines OTHER emotions like mystery, intrigue, sexuality, in a creative and compelling way.

And yes, for most sane women, BEING A GOOD PERSON counts, but you have to rethink what a “GOOD PERSON” means, because being a needy guy who will be her doormat because you “love her so much” is actually NOT being a good person. I’m not saying it’s being a BAD person, but it’s being an emotionally weak and unbalanced and emotionally DEFICIENT person.

Here’s another thing about attraction.

Not all girls are the same!

YES, certain things are UNIVERSAL. But not EVERYTHING.

So a party animal girl will not value all the same things as another girl.

Different types of girls will also value different types of humor, different types of lifestyles, different hobbies, and passions.

So you have to pay attention to the woman that you are interacting with.

And if you would like to learn how to APPLY all this in REAL LIFE, from exactly how to make the first approach ANYWHERE you find a woman, to HOW to develop that specific style of humor that women can’t help but feel is SEXY, to how to dress for attraction, to how to bridge to getting physical, to how to build a MEANINGFUL connection with a woman, to TONS more on how to make women INSTANTLY feel that INTOXICATING emotion called ATTRACTION for you, then you owe it yourself to get the most advanced program on this topic:

The Seduction Mastery Apprenticeship Program CD Set.

This Program was THREE YEARS in the making and you can now benefit from that dedication.

I swore to take this field to the NEXT LEVEL, so I focused that time on research and experimenting in the real world all that time, and released NOTHING ELSE during that time.

I could have released DOZENS of products simply on the quality info in the newsletters ALONE.

But even THAT was not high enough for my standards.

Years ago, I brought this field light years ahead and DESTROYED the MYTHS popularized by pick up artists that all women are the same, and the myth that all women are untrustworthy, and the myth that “memorized routines are the ONLY way to go” and that breakups are a natural process where all relationships must go ultimately. I was challenged by all the “experts”. Now, it’s been proven that I’m right.

You don’t need routines. You can meet quality women, but you have to be a quality guy. Breakups are only natural when the two people in the relationship aren’t both taking on the attitude of seeking greater value IN the person they are WITH.

And that’s just to name a few, never mind about a hundred other crucial topics on dating, attraction, pickup, emotion, and relationships that I was challenged on and now am proven right once again.

Well once again, this program is LIGHT YEARS ahead of its time. Maybe it’s because I’m not the kind of guy that plays on guys’ fears and I don’t sell or preach immature crap about destroying relationships. I’d rather spend my time on coming up with REAL stuff that actually HELPS people.

This program will REVOLUTIONIZE the way you look at attraction.

It’s at:

http://www.pick-up-women.com/seductionmastery.shtml